Focus on Talents & Money: How You can set Smart Money Goals Your Way Today!

In this episode of #TheAmberStittShow, Jovita and I talk about Emotional Intelligence ("EQ") in terms of goal setting and how #SelfAwareness impacts our success in building habits and achieving our goals.  

This pack will help you set goals in a way that reduces the:
-Self-Doubt
-Helps You Overcome Obstacles
-Keeps You Motivated

To learn more about using EQ to set smart goals and build success habits that translate into results, grab Jovita's free smart goal digital bundle: 
https://growwithjovita.com/smart-goals/ 

Listeners also receive a 15% discount off Jovita's "Smart Goals" Success Habits coaching packages. 

Visit https://growwithjovita.com/product-shop/coaching-products/ and enter code Amber15.

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Transcript

Amber 0:07
Hello, and welcome to the Amber Stitt Show. I'm your host Amber Stitt and today we welcome back my friend Jovita. Thanks for being here again!

Jovita
Yes, thanks for having me. I love this show.

Amber
The last time we were together we did a deep dive into #EmotionalIntelligence. And for those of you that have not listened to that episode yet, I recommend you go back and check that out. But let's have you Jovita talk a little bit about yourself and what you do every day. And then we can then start talking a little bit about a bigger push into our focus on the money segment, but I would like the audience to know a little bit about you before you begin.

Jovita 1:22
Thank you so much for having me. So my name is Jovita. I started @growwithJovita several years ago and I've been in management leadership for over two years now. And the reason I started growing up this is just that I saw a lack of leadership development in the corporate world, especially executive-level positions and I really wanted to provide that. So I provide career coaching, and probably also about most of the time, people are like, Okay, I want to make more money. And why What are you gonna do with that money? I don't have money management making more money....

Amber
As you are building that bridge between Emotional Intelligence and setting up these money goals. I always call it "Get Money Smart." We always start by focusing on talent. And I know that you and I both have multiple personality assessments that you had recently taken the Gallup Strength Finders assessment and that is something that I also work with every day. And so I think that's really instrumental once you kind of focus on your top strengths. We want to develop those talents and then we don't want to fix what we aren't but be aware of, maybe what we're not so talented at. And you just have to pull out those talents for a short period of time, but it's really certainly not what we do our best work. And so I always like starting with that as a foundation and then bringing that into the money management piece. So I really think that what you bring to the table and with your clients is really important. So let's talk about that a little bit more today. I've met some very high performing like Titans, who don't give it all away because they want that boutique approach. So it's not like you always need to stay in your lane that like you didn't know what your talents are, right?

Jovita 3:15
I mean, there's a balance to everything right? Like there is a balance of I can't I have to be myself because like you said earlier as it aligns with like, you're not misaligned and it causes reactions. To a certain extent, I do still need to understand that there are other people out there that are not like me, and I can't just put how I am on everybody else. So there's definitely a balance like, you know, with delegating, as you said, it's an easy one. There are certain things that I don't like delegating time and I'm gonna hold on to it but there are other things I've learned how to delegate and a lot of that again. What am I?

Unknown 3:58
Why you're not doing super well, then you probably need

Unknown 4:03
to delegate it. Yeah. And it's kind of like, you gotta accept I think the thing that's the hardest about delegating is that you have to accept that people are not going to do it the same way that I do it. And when I first started delegating, it was because it was held, it's again, it's one of those things that hold you back in your career. If you're really good at this thing. Then they are going to always want you to do this thing. You're never going to be able to backfill your position or backfill these tasks. at that. That's when people are like, Oh my gosh, I'm doing my job to three people. And it's like, yeah, because you've taken on this debt and you don't know how to let anything go. You know, not only are you like not enough in your career, but nobody else can do the thing that you're doing. But now you're overwhelmed and stressed because you're doing all of these things. And that's kind of what again, I had to realize like this isn't helping me by holding on to these things. It's actually hurting me.

Amber 4:54
You mean like we could cross-train to let someone else assist, but it's not like your true best talents. It's like you can do it and do it right. Yeah, it's something that could be cross trained. So someone else could be pulled in so then you can go in and master what you really need to be mastering.

Jovita 5:12
You should be focused and that's again the best part of the reframe, right there's like I can be focusing on our high-impact different activities, my development, and growth instead of still doing this thing. Yeah. So yeah, it's just it's the same kind of concept is just works every single time. It's like if you just kind of take a step back and realize why am I not letting this go? Like, what is my what is my emotion about this? Is it because I'm worried that somebody's gonna look at me as like, Why aren't Why am I not doing this? Because I have trouble trusting other people is it because like, what is it like what is that emotion and then like you say, framing it, and then you're good to go? So like once you get that reframe. It just makes you again, you're still going to feel that feeling but it's not going to be as strong and it's not going to cause you to behave in that way.

Right? So, sometimes don't do the full-on personal development together. So you might have one or two of us that are like, Hey, I know who I am. And maybe other people don't know how this might all work yet. It's still powerful to be in the room because I think that brings confidence when you know who you are, and how you might tick. You might be able to actually explain that to your boss or even in an interview. I've had people use me for some consulting and say, Hey, I'd love to go in for an interview. Do I bring up the fact that I've done Strength Finders or the disc or Myers and I say, you probably can bring it up because if you say I lead with, these are my talents and those questions are like, what are your positives or what are the old school you know, interview questions that are out there? You can always reframe those and not answer those specifically like my negative things are, you could say, for example, I'm high communication. And you mentioned in our original episode together, kind of like when you lose somebody, you can just see their body language change. When I work with my clients, I'm great at giving a lot of information in a small window of time and it's specifically because they're looking for an insurance product. They're coming to me because they know they want it it's not like I'm just trying to explain here's why you need it. They're coming to me I know they want it so I package the information and make it as clear as possible. I'm really efficient with my time. Very important and if we're really short on time when we end the call quickly, it's not there are no feelings hurt. We did our job. So when I take that same type of mindset, and I go out into a different experience, and I'm talking about hey, what do you do? When people might ask me and I'm explaining it, it's like you can just see their eyes glaze over. Like what are you talking about risk management, Sharon, I just have to go don't get your feelings hurt Amber because it's just it's not their thing until maybe it's time but I know that I know not to take things personally so my high communication can be very overwhelming. And my grandmother I talked about her on my podcast where she knows what her strengths are and she has gone decades feeling a little bad about herself because she can overwhelming and she has high input just like me they said to grandma about six months ago I go that is because you have high intellection and futuristic and all these things you love learning and then you want to give it away and she goes oh my gosh, my mother used to tell me to stop talking so much Marjorie and I go Oh, Grandma, it's only they have this back then. That yeah, I know my communication is so important for certain parts of my work. But I know that I have to turn it off and especially with my husband, sometimes he just not want to hear about the latest thing that I'm implementing, especially on social media. He just goes home, his eyes just glazed over and I just know it's not the time so utilize some of that work for your individual life. It's so much it can be fun when you just know how things are working and why there could be a trigger but you just know how to kind of just sit back and it's just not the time or place. So

Jovita 9:11
So like the thing that you're talking about is we have to be willing to accept that like, I'm not for everybody, right? Like I'm not everybody's cup of tea. I can't control that part of like what you're saying if you're working in a team or if you're out networking or even in your family, right like I can't control that. Like everything about my personality isn't going to jail or being interesting to other people. But what I can do is manage my own feelings about that, right? Are my feelings heard about in some kind of way about that? I can still manage that. And then I also pay more attention to other people. So the thing that I love about self-awareness and emotional intelligence, like the better you get at understanding yourself, the more easily you understand other people, like your interpersonal savvy skills are going to also increase because now you're noticing other people's behavior, their attitudes, and things to where it's gonna make it so much more. Your connection with those people is going to be so much stronger because you're trying to relate and communicate in the style that they write like you are not just me and this is you're also trying to almost like collaborating or conversation but your conversation shouldn't be too, to wait. It shouldn't just be you talking to somebody. It should be both of you engaging and in order for people to feel safe enough to open up and be vulnerable. You have to create that sense of safety by using emotional intelligence and self-awareness techniques.

Amber 10:56
So I think that was a perfect place to segue into focusing on money because we all operate differently. We all receive information differently. I love a hard hardcover book. I don't do well with say a screen, going through pages where some of my friends love to hear audiobooks. My husband doesn't prefer to read he likes more of that videos. So people receive information differently. When we go into really getting money smart. I call it getting money smart doorway focusing on your talents first then how do you set your money goals? I thought Jovita was perfect for us to talk about that today because you really get the emotional intelligence piece to understand personal development and then self-awareness. Wouldn't it be amazing if you could set your money goals based on how your personality? And oh my gosh, I always think of this like if you're working with a partner could be a business partner, a spouse partner. What if we were kind to each other to say, hey, we're gonna look at this differently, but we're gonna be a team and really build this out to have some success, but it's got to be on my own metrics for me. Your metrics are yours, but let's talk about it because that to me would just cut out so much maybe noise when it comes to when when when we work on, you know when it's not always about couples that like if we can understand how we manage our money and little hacks and tricks and little things we might need based on our personality. We can have more success and then if we can understand how others might participate in that whether it's a spouse, a child, or a business partner if we can come together and be okay with the fact that we are different. I think that there are definitely ways to have more success. So I want to talk about that today for my second piece of the Pathways of Peak Performance is Focusing on Money, but doing it your way. Jovita, Let's talk a little bit about we had we touched on emotional intelligence in our first episode together. Let's start there. Again. Let's do like a little mini crash course on what is coming from your perspective because I think that's a way to really start because then we can dive into goal setting.

Jovita 13:17
Yeah, absolutely. So I love that you start with the Focus on Talents and Focus on Money because it's definitely something in my career coaching business that I help women with as well because when you think about trying to develop or grow or enhance your career, the money part of that goes hand in hand. You're advancing your career or you're trying to make more money or get a raise or get a promotion because you're trying to achieve certain things in your life. Right. So I always say your career
is a tool for you to build the life that you want. And rather you say that money is an emotional topic. So you can't talk about money without talking about the emotions attached to that. So the emotional intelligence just to touch on again, what we talked about is really about understanding yourself and correctly identifying your emotions, being able to proactively manage them, so that your behavior and attitude reactions are positive and not coming across in a negative way or hurting you in a negative way. It's going to help you reduce that emotional stress to your point about whether it's a spouse and other family member or roommate, right. Like you have emotional intelligence and understand other people's emotions and feelings about money. It's going to make it easier for you to have those conversations. And then finally, you just really want to have a positive relationship with money. I know that in our society, there are a lot of trigger points about money and about success. And so like if you have a negative relationship with money in terms of how you feel emotionally about it, it's going to always call us to maybe not fit almost in the right way or not able to handle you know life. But like life, life happens and you need money to deal with it. So I think that having a really good handle on your emotional intelligence is going to definitely help with your money skills. I actually don't think I've mentioned this before, but I did a couple of courses that I actually put together. So at my company coming to rich financial where I'm Vice President of Operations, I did a five-week budget course where I taught this was like an extra like mentorship thing that I did for the employees where it was like let me teach you how to like your budgeting one on one, like a financial foundation. I did the same kind of course for a nonprofit called Phoenix Dream Center. And we focus on helping people who have been victims of sex trafficking, tried to like be acclimated back into the world and so I did like seven hours about like, how can you understand this relationship with money and how you can use it to like build this as they want so let's talk about this goal setting because I'm I definitely want to be able to provide these tools to your audience as well. Well,

Amber 16:10
I mean with all the work that you've done almost a decade now. Do you think everyone needs big, very complex goals?

Jovita 16:19
So I will say that in my controversial opinion I'm more of a fan of small achievable goals. There are some people and it's really personality-driven, I would have to say like this is why a Gallup assessment and knowing yourself as some people need those like titles and stretch goals and they really need that to force them to push themselves beyond what I don't like that I have a personality. So one of my top five and my Gallup assessment is discipline. And so I have a very of like, structure and discipline in progress like I need to see progress is happening. And so for me, having like small, achievable, I was smart goals, right? Like I've set SMART goals. And I'm not saying that they're so easy that they're not challenging. No, but you're feeling the reward for some of the work that you're doing. That helps propel you to keep going. Yes, because for me when I set these big, gigantic goals, if I if I'm like halfway through and I'm like, I'm not gonna achieve it, I might just give up right? And so that's the thing of like, you really need to know yourself, but like, know, the emotions behind that. So like, why don't I like setting big goals and why do the small goals were for me? So on the emotional level the small goals work for me because I just like being able to celebrate myself. I like that sense of recognition and accomplishment. And I want to be able to get that faster, as opposed to some people are totally fine of like, I'm willing to wait for this big result at the end and that's okay. Like there's no right or wrong. It's just really knowing what works for me and what works for you.

Amber 18:04
Yeah, I feel like in the business world, and in this world of maybe self improvement if you think of like the place you might go and the Barnes and Noble like head back there. Let's get smart with our personal finance. Yeah, goals are important, but it's almost like people that write a book. Writing doesn't literally mean you always have to be using a pen, pencil, or paper journal. It could be that you're literally thinking and maybe you're typing it out for your audio recorded somewhere. So like goal setting couldn't live more in a mental state, I think and the goals can just be different for different people. But as you do. Like if you're not highly disciplined, there are little things like automated I know that in some of the top five and I see people have adaptability, there's a there's actually this is almost one of my favorites, but it's also one of those that it's really hard for me, people with high adaptability, you would think that it means you walk into the room and you can just adapt the environment. But it actually is more of that go with the flow fight fly by the seat of your pants. I have low adaptability, I'm more rigid. I have a routine everything needs to fall into the calendar. My business partner and husband are high Adaptability. Oh boy. He could drive me nuts. So sometimes I talk to him and I say your adaptability is really driving me nuts today and we laugh about it but his strengths and talents and his business. He has a two other businesses he that's really good for his work. So it does shine when it needs to but it can drive me nuts. But people that might have high adaptability don't mean they're bad for a team. They're actually probably pretty good to partner with a person like myself. It can bring more of a flow, a little bit of an ease it's actually pushes me on vacation sometimes to that, you know, otherwise I wouldn't allow for but those people with adaptability might need more strict processes. They have to open up and dial into my mother's the same way she has to have an actual system to follow. And she loves that but when she's off work, she has not scheduled out that way. She's like, I want to relax. I don't want to be looking at the schedule. I think this is the perfect time to use a money example.

Jovita
Right? So I help when I coach people. A lot of the starting point when you're talking about money is debt. I mean, let's face it, like a lot of people have been in America and so it's something that we'd have to drink but that credit card debt is the worst one. So for example, somebody who has a credit card, not as disciplined. They are probably going to be the people who are overspending their credit cards so like I have a credit card, but I also have like the most elaborate spreadsheet in the world of like how I budget my money. Everybody's not like that. And I'm not suggesting everybody get a spreadsheet. But what I am saying is if you're not disciplined enough to use that credit card only for the amount to pay each month, then you have to stop you having to like I really tell people like stop having a credit card, use gift cards, use cash, other things so that you can have that discipline built in like you're saying these automatic things that are available to you. And then the reason you got to think about that is like what is the emotion about why they're using the credit card, right? So again, this goes back to really understanding the emotion. So typically what I see, especially for people who have kids, so people tend to overspend because they have a hard time telling their kids to know they don't want to be they don't like that feeling of like I can't provide for their child or I have to tell them to know when they say that they want something or let's face it. Parents tell me all the time like the kids need something unexpected something, something medical, something comes up and so you just use that credit card, because you don't really have you don't have your emergency savings built up and now you're putting things on a credit card, right? Like you got to think about the emotion of why you're using the credit card to attach that to your personality of like how you set goals to manage money, and then now we can come up with a plan right? So then I have a plan of this is how you're going to get out of debt. This is how you're going to use your credit card effectively to build credit. This is how you can still do things for your child, but having a certain budget right like you have cash that's like son or daughter. I've got 20 bucks, find something that's within 20 bucks, right? When you go on vacation, I just told the woman who was going out of town and she has the same kind of trouble with using her credit card and I'm like don't take your credit card. If you need to keep your cards or take out the cash and do that because once the money's right so it really just got deep into that awareness of what works for you. And then those when you're dealing with another person, whether it's a child with a spouse, whether it may be you're on vacation with a friend and your friend likes to spend money like crazy and you're like Hey, I gotta be more mindful in my brain. I think it's like by having those emotional intelligence appeals again, and have those conversations where you don't have to be ashamed about not having money or your skills about anything. It's really about feeling more confident and helping you have those conversations. You need to have the conversations you can't avoid them. All that's gonna do is avoid them. It's creating more negativity. You know, when you look at your bank account next month, and you're like what happened?

Amber 29:43
Gosh, there are just so many things. I love your perspective on that. I think what's important, and I always talk about this when it comes to the pathways of peak performance. And when you listen to the original pathways, like why I built this five steps system, it really came from the very beginning of COVID It was like the collection of the greatest hits of all these stories of my clients and things that people are going through and just the stress and the mental illness and all these things are just combined. It was just completely triggered by what was going on starting in 2020. You can be proactive in advance and not reactive. When you get through so much. If it's COVID. If it's a sickness, hey, I'm on maternity leave, and I'm not getting paid for a period of time, whatever it might be. You start with the foundation, know who you are, how do you tick and how are you going to react. So if you're on that vacation, and you're overspending because your friend has more money and that is a problem. Maybe we have to relook and reframe who our friends are because if they're not accepting of the situation, maybe that's just not the trip you'd go on but you got to look within yourself. Part of the other piece when it comes to getting money smart. is I want people to feel more confident that not everybody has a bachelor's in finance. I am not an accounting brain. I am still smart enough to build out a business or work with people in the finance and financial services arena. There's such a place for anyone as long as they want to serve others but you don't always have to be plugging in numbers like you said a spreadsheet. I love a spreadsheet but I'm not mapping out numbers for my clients. I know my gift is in transactional work and insurance. That's where I stay so when we're talking about goal setting, I want people back to the word that half the confidence, keep talking about competence, but you're real with yourself and you know how you need to set some things up so that you're more successful, have more confidence and then you're not reacting. So I love that idea because the money's gone. You can't find the extra pina colada or whatever at the $20 cocktail. Okay, but then you're also allowing yourself to spend money. I feel like right now there's a thing that's happening where we're almost like it's okay to go get that cup of coffee if everything else is dialed in. So I think we were always told, like, make sure you're budgeting and not spending money for whatever, you know, don't be overspending for these frills. But I think sometimes if you've done the work, you can reward yourself or whatever it might be. So I think if you're utilizing some of the tips, like you're saying, maybe you can splurge a little bit because you've done the work in advance. And so if you're more routine, like like us, maybe it's a little bit easier, but build the systems and if you are a little bit more like my husband, that's okay too. It's okay. How you are built that building the systems that can help you

Jovita 32:45
Yeah, absolutely. And I do want to touch on so like you and I are both very proactive people like that. We have the ability to see steps and steps and steps into the future. But not everybody is like that. And so when I work with clients who are not able to like understand, one of the things that I tell them is this is the easiest way for me to get you to maybe can't think as far ahead as I can't I just need a couple of senses. Like it's not a matter of if it's a matter of you're always going to have a tire blowout, the middle class, the kid's situation, you know, unexpected expenses. This is life like this is what happened, you know, maybe the raise you thought you were going to get didn't come through like these are things that are going to happen. So stop thinking about, well if this happens, and just know that it's going to happen. So So instead of trying to think of like, when is it going to happen, just know that it's going to happen? And that kind of helps people take the pressure off of like trying to figure out you know, this week and this week in September and October November like it's gonna happen The second thing that you mentioned about like, okay, maybe if my relationships with people are not working out, we need to rethink our relationships. And I think that one thing that people do struggle with because it can be a competitive thing is having conversations about money. It just is hard it's a difficult conversation to have right? So again, like let's try to come up with ways to bring up that conversation that when you How do I want to say that feel less threatening, right like you're not you don't have to divulge all of your personal financial information, right? I mean, you have a budget so I'm gonna give you a perfect example. I just last week, had replaced my AC unit. I live in Arizona, it's 100 degrees at all times and obviously for anybody who is a homeowner, you know, that is a very expensive purchase. And I have some plans with my friends coming up this weekend. And I need to adjust them but I didn't need to go into details about it in a conversation that was like, hey, some things in my budget have changed. I'm not able to do this. But what if we do this instead? Right? So instead of feeling like I'm saying no, or I can't do this, I'm like, what if I all offer an alternative right? That is in my price range that so like instead of going out on a girl's night we were like, going out and I'm spending money on like $20 drinks and all this stuff? Why don't we do like a game night at my house and then I can have wine and we can have stuff but it's way low-quality time. Right? It's exactly so I think it's it's, you know, try different things, you know that like you're comfortable with it. I think that helps. I don't think of it as like, I have to say no and cut things off. Because that can be really hard for people, especially if they don't have that discipline type. like I do, like it's really hard to like go cold turkey or like St. Louis, but if you kind of flip it of like Okay, I can't do this, but I can do this. I can't do this but I can do this. Maybe I can't have the Starbucks coffee every day of the week, but I could maybe have it once a week as a reward or I can go to this other coffee shop that's less expensive. Or maybe I don't even really want the coffee and I'd rather save that and put it towards something different right? So I think if we look at it, as well not eliminating as much as we're just, you know, again, it's a mindset, it's a reframe in our mind to help our emotional side of things. Do not get so stressed or anxious or guilty or insecure. And it really just helps to have that better relationship with money. Like I said when you get a few weeks outside of that event that you may be given an alternative you've modified the plans and then you're two weeks out and you don't have that thing on the credit card or whatever it might be it feels so good.

Amber
And then you're limiting your stress. Yeah, it's amazing. What if we could do that for ourselves? So I always love talking with you about how to just really dial into ourselves and then make things work, whether it's you know, on the personal side, but then rolling it into business too. But really having people build many goals to the customer success and have fun with it. So Jovita how do we have people find you? Where can they find you if they want to hang out after the fact?

Jovita 37:29
Yeah, absolutely. So I'm actually going to provide a free goal-setting tracker and habit tracker for your audience. So I'll put the link in there.

My website is www.growwithjovita.com. I'm also on LinkedIn and Instagram. But I definitely want to give that freebie because again, I'm a person that's like I need to kind of see things so I need to I'm a visual person. I'm a visual learner. But you know if you're not, if you're if you can keep it on your mind and keep track of it, that's fine as well. But really setting those goals to habit trackers help. I'll also provide a discount code for anybody who wants to get my smart goals and success habits.

For additional coaching like I said, I've done different courses for people who are getting old and budgeting and stuff like that. So I just want to help your

Amber 38:18
Perfect! Well, More to come. So I appreciate you being with us today. And thanks for everybody listening, and I'll see you next time!

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