Amber [00:00:00]:
Hello and welcome to The Amber Stitt Show. I am your host, Amber Stitt. And today we welcome Victoria Pelletier, today an Amazon bestseller and entrepreneur, among many things. So I would love for you to share with our audience today a little bit about you to bio yourself because I can't even do you justice because there's just so much going on. But I'm so excited to unpack it today. So welcome, Victoria. And can you share with our audience a little bit about you and what you do? And we'll get started with that.
Victoria Pelletier [00:00:33]:
Absolutely. Well, let me say, Amber, thanks for having me on the show. I'm really excited to be here, and it's difficult to describe what I do exactly. In fact, I have a word that I've put in my email signature line, and I think it might even be on my LinkedIn profile as a multi potentialite. And by that I mean I have a multitude of diverse interests. So I am a corporate executive, 20 plus years at the C-suite in predominantly B2B professional services. I've also built and bought companies. As I joked with you earlier, I've almost always had side hustles.
Victoria Pelletier [00:01:04]:
In addition to the C-suite executive, I'm a wife, a mother of two, now adult humans, which makes me feel really old. I'm a fitness fanatic, foodie, and a wine lover. How's that?
Amber [00:01:17]:
Perfect. I love it. Well, there's something we share in common, I think, not knowing you that well, but following you for some time is that I'm like in this mantra of take action today, and I really am a little impatient in a good way for my clients where I say, "Let's get started, let's be proactive, let's get something done here." And I think you have a mantra of something like the no excuses mantra. And I know that I think comes from maybe how you've grown up, maybe you were always a high achiever. I mean, clearly all these things that you're mentioning, this is what I like our pathways audience to know about is how are people finding their path into various positions, jobs. There's really no right way to do things. There's a way to treat people and be out there as thought leaders and then always growing those leadership skills.
Amber [00:02:05]:
Or if you can bring a solution to anybody, there's always ways that you can be maybe an employee, entrepreneur, or a combination of both. And it just has to fit what you're passionate about. So can we step back in time? Were you always just this high achiever? You're just born with it. How did that come about?
Victoria Pelletier [00:02:19]:
It's a little bit of this debate, "nature vs. nurture" right, Amber? And for me, I do believe there's a portion of it that is innate. It's in my DNA, for sure. Fight or flight. I'm a fighter. That's somewhere deep in the DNA. However, I do think there are circumstances that deeply contributed to the drive that I have and my desire to be better than...
Victoria Pelletier [00:02:42]:
And that is, and I will tell you, I wasn't as open about sharing this until ten plus years ago. And I feel like I wore this all business, all the time mask. I wasn't going to be vulnerable. I wasn't going to show emotions. And so my origin story, "my why", is that I'm born to a drug addicted teenage mother who was exceptionally abusive to me, in and out of the child welfare system. However, I was fortunate to be adopted into a family. No more abused. My mother, in particular, incredible woman, did so much to help this scarred little girl. However, lower socioeconomic position.
Victoria Pelletier [00:03:19]:
Never had to worry about having food insecurity, or not having clothing. But there was no money to do much extra. So I started working at age eleven.
Amber [00:03:27]:
So you were just aware of that and you say, there's got to be a different way, and so you just went after it to get what you wanted. So you knew that you'd had to make it happen for yourself, it sounds like. But you did have a support system eventually, but not everybody always has that opportunity. But you worked within some of those challenges, it sounds like.
Victoria Pelletier [00:03:44]:
Yeah, I remember my mom said to me, I think I was probably eleven or twelve years old. I remember her saying, "Tori, you need to do better than this." And she meant vocationally, from an education standpoint. My mom was a secretary, my dad a janitor. And I will tell you, though, they...
Amber [00:03:58]:
Hard workers.
Victoria Pelletier [00:03:59]:
Hard workers. And they didn't have to say that to me. So for me, that drive comes from the fact that I wanted to be better than my biology, or my circumstance. That's where the "no excuses" mindset and being unstoppable comes from.
Amber [00:04:14]:
Yeah, well, thank you for sharing that. I think that's part of one of your books, and I think you're in the middle of writing more, is that correct?
Victoria Pelletier [00:04:21]:
I am. So I shared openly the story I contributed to a co-authored book called "Unstoppable" many years ago. When the publishers approached me, I'm like, "That is my mantra. So, yes, I will contribute. Yes, I will join." I now have two that are in the works. One will come out early in 2024 around personal branding. Which is something I've been very focused on for many, many years.
Victoria Pelletier [00:04:38]:
And the other one is around my phrase that is trademarked "Whole Human Leadership", just a very different way, leading and creating great organizational culture.
Amber [00:04:48]:
Okay, so there's a pillar system with Pathways of Peak Performance that we follow here. And so when we have people come on to the podcast, it's not like we focus on all five, but we talk about talents as our first foundational step. And then we go into focusing on money, goals, and how to transfer risk based upon your personality, what drives you. But then there's this marketing. The fourth part is marketing and technology and innovating. And people sometimes think like personal branding outside of the Instagram scrolling and those types of things. But can you elaborate there? I feel like for me, and when I work with other organizations or other people, I do a lot of work with advocacy for next generation and trying to pull the younger people into the business to help other people. The way we are out there in the world, there's only one of you.
Amber [00:05:31]:
There's so much that we can give to others. But I think sometimes we almost downplay our strengths or like, I don't know if this is true about the ten years that you weren't vulnerable, but sometimes we put this game face on and we're like, "Okay, I'm in this industry. I have to be a certain way so people take me seriously." But we're not, like, cracking the shell to really open up and have people understand who we are. And I think people need to know, and sometimes that's sharing our stories, but for some reason, sometimes we lack the confidence. I know I've been there before, and if people say I'm good at something and they'd give me a compliment, I might be like, "Oh, no." And I kind of downplay it. And I've had other women supporters say, "Stop doing that.
Amber [00:06:08]:
You're good at this. Don't downplay it." So, to me, personal branding is not just like the color palette on my website. It's more than that. So do you mind giving us a little teaser on what you are talking about here next year?
Victoria Pelletier [00:06:23]:
Definitely. So I think what you're talking about, Amber, is where I see most people sort of stop. They think it's having a beautiful profile photo on LinkedIn or on your website for entrepreneurs, et cetera, and focusing on the first element, and I believe there's four to your personal brand. And the first is, what is my subject matter expertise? So they focus on what I went to school for, the work that I'm currently doing, or the company that I'm working for. And that's it. Well, that's sort of foundational for sure. But then beyond that, it is what is our story? What are the interests and values and passion that we have that create connection and bond to other people? One thing I tell people, remember, "People do business with people they like and trust, therefore they want to do business with." And so what is it about you that they would like? Again, what shared passions, interests do you have? The next one is what makes you different? There are many people that can do what I do in the industry that I am in and might have the same amount of experience that I have, but what makes me different? So things like who I am as a leader, the fact that I am radically candid, there's no meeting after the meeting with me.
Victoria Pelletier [00:07:33]:
Cards are on the table. To quote from Kim Scott's book, "We do it from a place of care and compassion to see progress." So that's one of my differentiations. The last one, what do you want to be known for? What kind of impact and legacy do you want to leave? And those elements together is what creates a more holistic personal brand.
Amber [00:07:52]:
And staying true to that. And no apologies, just that's who you are and people need to know that. And you're bringing something special to the table, like you said. And I know you speak to other businesses on this topic, correct? You speak to groups about this. Now, you talked about more of the corporations, the businesses. Something I'm noticing, especially in financial services, is that the personal branding, if we're under this institution, this bank that we work for, this corporation, some people assume, well, it's just I work here and they forget about them inside the organization. I think globally now, we really have to take that seriously, even if we're not out there on our own as our own entrepreneur, business owner ever, or yet, still having that show up in the workforce I think is important. And giving yourself that time to shine, I mean, that in itself can make you stand out.
Amber [00:08:41]:
It's often like sometimes you don't know people are watching. And then if you're really being true to yourself, I think that's where sometimes the magic happens. And then there's more opportunities for being true to yourself. And so I know you're working a lot with leadership and you have for a long time. Can you share a little bit about like for you, giving the audience a takeaway? What is something that is just like rinse and repeat, always shows up and you're like, it's common sense, or maybe it's not. Maybe it's like so subtle, but that is just something that someone can quickly fix or needs to have awareness of. Is there anything that's just like...you always see it?
Victoria Pelletier [00:09:14]:
There is one thing, and it's because I made mistakes early in my leadership journey connected to being authentic and being, in my case I think, fearful. So I became COO of a company at age 24. Brand new mother, as well. So I was the only female executive and I was the youngest by a couple of decades. And it was a stretch role. So I wasn't sure I belonged there. Not to mention the experience in my youth. So I showed up, as I said, a mask.
Victoria Pelletier [00:09:40]:
All business, all the time. I am not going to give you a reason to believe that I shouldn't be at this table in that meant I shouldn't be emotional and I shouldn't be vulnerable. And so I got a nickname. I found out in my mid to late 20s as the Iron Maiden.
Amber [00:09:54]:
This came from, I'm guessing, a lot of the men in the industry in your business.
Victoria Pelletier [00:09:58]:
I think some of it is actually a bit of a gender sort of stereotype in that I have always come across confident and strong and very strong delivery in meetings. And what is assertiveness as a woman often they'll say as being aggressive or using the ____ word, or whatever. So I think there was a small aspect of that. But I do own that as well. I was highly effective at managing the business and achieving the outcomes financially, managing people. I've been through 18 mergers and acquisitions. I've done a ton of restructuring. And so, unfortunately, to impact people's livelihood either by restructuring as a result of some kind of M & A, or managing performance.
Victoria Pelletier [00:10:38]:
And I didn't show the softer side of me. So the Iron Maiden did crush me because my nickname from my best friend is Turtle. And that is, I have a tough exterior. I'm extremely resilient, but I'm all marshmallow inside. And so as a leader, what I'd say, the advice to your listeners is to find that balance. And so I said earlier, "Whole Human Leader," we show up with all of our lived experience stuff that's happened in our homes on the weekend, as do our employees. So as a leader, I want people to learn how to build authentic connection with people. And that comes through learning more about our employees, through sharing more of our experiences and our emotions.
Victoria Pelletier [00:11:18]:
And people are afraid to do that. And I think they underestimate just how incredibly powerful it is in building relationships and teams that subsequently drives employee engagement, productivity, and all the amazing outcomes that we want to see in business.
Amber [00:11:33]:
Well, you're talking about emotions. I think a lot of people just equate that to a female, but no, that could just be any human. And people have sometimes, like, for me, I'm not as compassionate or run with empathy as much as some of my counterparts, but I'm very responsible. So my work product is getting people to the next step efficiently. So that's where I might not be as warm and fuzzy. And when I hire people, I have to tell people, "Okay, by the way, if we're in different time zones and we're working together, I might just be like, bang, bang, bang, need something. But it's not personal. I just sometimes go after that.
Amber [00:12:02]:
Is that going to be okay for you?" I need to know that. But I think sometimes it is a little stereotypical to assume it's just, like a female thing. I think all people on the team should have that understanding. There's something else, too. I was just recently on moderating a next generation panel, and a lot of the younger people that I had on the panel, they were saying there's also this, like, we support women thing, but then it's almost like highly competitive, still behind the scenes. And they were using the terminology horizontal oppression, or I think there's a term like that. And are we really supportive? Are we just checking the box that we're supportive? So it was almost like, have some reflection, and if you're really not supporting that other person, or if you could just take the extra moment to say something, it can be really effective. It's almost like there's this thing happening that are we truly supporting? I don't know if you've seen that, where it's almost like the tick of the box, but is it really supportive, and is that culture really there on your team?
Victoria Pelletier [00:12:56]:
Yeah, I agree. There's a phrase I use with many things, whether it's your personal branding or when it comes to diversity, equity and inclusion, and that is "strategic intentionality" in that we need to be intentional about how we're going to move the needle forward as it relates to diversity. There isn't a magic bullet in this, where I think there's this myopic focus on hiring diverse talent, but then doing nothing to build a system around it.
Amber [00:13:24]:
It's like the leadership workshop. Yay, we did that. But are we actually applying what the tools are? And I've seen that, too, where it's really fun and everyone's excited, but then the leaders kind of calm, like little balloons. They float up to the sky. And then they're gone, and everyone's like, are we doing the work here? And I feel like I've seen that a lot in the last few years.
Victoria Pelletier [00:13:42]:
Yeah, absolutely. I think there was one company I worked for a number of years ago where we were touting ourselves and so happy that 53% of our new college graduate hires were women. And so I don't know what job grade that was. Let's call it a five or a six, and a couple of levels above that, where they start getting into leadership roles. All of a sudden, we start to see a decline. It's like, okay, again, we're doing great at hiring gender employees, but then what are we doing to create an environment for them to stay? Is it the culture, the policies, as they start to...at that point, we think several years after college start to...If they choose to marry, choose to have children, like, are we creating an
Amber [00:14:20]:
environment, like, investing in them inside the team and then retaining them because you care about the people that you brought in from maybe that entry position or entry level. You've mentioned something in one of your previous interviews about, and I'll not say this right, so I'll let you kind of fix it. But production and not so much schedule. Do you know what I'm saying? Because I was like, "Yes, let's get results and not micromanage." Because I do a lot of virtual, high volume transactional work. I'm very effective. When I'm just at my desk, I tease, like, I'm almost like a gamer. I'm in all my inboxes,
Amber [00:14:57]:
I got my apps, and I'm just, like, working hard in a very focused. Almost like I batched time depending upon what my projects are, and I could be so efficient that way. And that's not a traditional way to show up to a job. And so do you have something to share about that? Because I feel like I've heard that before from you.
Victoria Pelletier [00:15:13]:
You have. I have a phrase, and it was long, long before COVID time. Much before of this remote work. And my saying is, "There are no schedules. There are just deliverables."
Amber [00:15:23]:
Okay. That's what it was. I remember hearing that.
Victoria Pelletier [00:15:25]:
Yeah. And that means, as a leader, we need to be really clear with our team around how success is measured in their role, what deliverables or outcomes we are expecting, and then also trusting them to deliver against that.
Amber [00:15:37]:
Yeah. We're hiring them because they're good at X, so let's let them do that.
Victoria Pelletier [00:15:41]:
Don't ask me for permission to leave early to take a child to a doctor's appointment or, I mean, there's some exceptions. If we have a client commitment, we need to be on the phone at a certain time for a meeting.
Amber [00:15:50]:
Already been on the calendar. Yeah, right.
Victoria Pelletier [00:15:52]:
But otherwise, no, you never needed to ask me for permission. And what I've seen, though, is, unfortunately, post Covid, and now we see it with the return to physical offices. Some of that comes as a result of lack of trust of our employees. I'm like, but they've done it for the last several years at home and actually demonstrated, for the most part, greater...
Amber [00:16:09]:
Right. So I want to talk about that for a moment, because when I do Gallup Strength Finder coaching for people, I've done it for boards and then some financial firms. There are certain personalities that need to be in the office. They literally thrive by being out of their house. They go, I can't focus at home. I just won't get it done. Or, there's the kids, or there's, or whatever it is. Okay, so they like the drive, getting in and having that time.
Amber [00:16:33]:
Not everyone operates like that. So I know that there are some personality types that really need to see the person they're helping, or the team, or whatever. It sounds like there's not just one way. I was even asking an insurance company about, is there a hybrid position locally, or do you have to be at the home, office, city, and state? They're like, home, office, city, and state only. Do you have any thoughts on that? Because I almost feel like it's a personality trait. Who vibes in front of people and then who are very productive at their desk and not driving in. Any thoughts about that?
Victoria Pelletier [00:17:01]:
I think that we need to be creating hybrid environments that balance the needs of the employees and also recognizes that there are still great things that happen when we are together in person. And so things like innovation and problem solving and getting us physically together in rooms versus in a Zoom call where we know people are multitasking. And so creating that, again, hybrid environment and creating flexibility. I'm a very social person, and so I like to get out and network, but at the same time, if I'm going to be sitting on back to back Zoom calls, don't make me go to an office to do that.
Amber [00:17:34]:
Yeah. Again, efficiency.
Victoria Pelletier [00:17:36]:
And so give flexibility to employees. Some are going to want to be in five days a week because, as you said, they've got children at home or too many distractions, or whatnot. Others might want one. So let's find a way to create more of a balance and flexibility.
Amber [00:17:49]:
Yeah. Certain people that I've coached even will get highly exhausted if they're in a public environment for too long. It just is exhausting. So there's also this awareness, like, okay, if that's more their style, that one day a week is probably perfect and others want to see them, too. So it's having that balance, but giving the opportunity, trying to be creative, I just think that's the way of the world now. If we have access to check inboxes and see production or whatever the product is, like, see the sales, it's not happening. That person might not be working out, but does that really depend on when they start and when they stop their day? I mean, I suppose it depends on the appointments, time zones, and who your client is, but I'm sure we can be creative because we had to with COVID.
Victoria Pelletier [00:18:28]:
Oh, 100%, I actually went on a cruise this summer, and there was a woman who, she was celebrating her 30th birthday, and she decided to go on her own, but she worked east coast hours in the US, but we were in Europe, and so she adjusted her schedule, and she was still working for several of the days that she was there. And she was in sales. Highly effective. She was doing what she needed to. And I'm like, great, amazing for you. And I'm glad that her company allowed her to do that.
Amber [00:18:54]:
Yeah, well, and I think part of what I help people with, or think about, even in my own home, is not this antiquated approach to retirement and success way out there into the future, waiting for that time, it's like highly successful people. And I know you can speak to this because you just talked about 20 years of different things you have been doing, but working with others and being around these people, as well. The highly successful people are not just doing the one thing, they're doing multiple things. So if you can have effective time frames and being like the Europe travel, but still having time to get in front of that inbox, or whatever the case might be, there's a lot of financial freedom in that. If you let people have that option, I suppose, is kind of where I'm heading. And that's where I feel like part of what you were doing for people is allowing them to see their true potential with kind of where they're coming from, their drive, but then not having any excuses, but how to apply that. A lot of times you need other people to help you with that, to see the true potential. And that's where I think a lot of the effective executive coaching can come from.
Amber [00:19:56]:
And I see that on teams. Like, once that starts happening and you're personally investing your time, or in your team, people truly shine. And I know Gallup even talks about lots of statistics. If you do that, there's so much more productivity and just engagement and happiness within teams.
Victoria Pelletier [00:20:12]:
Yeah, there is. I think that's where going back to sort of the way in which we lead, recognizing that some of these things we're doing aren't just nice to haves, nice to do the right thing, it actually absolutely drives business results because we have happy employees.
Amber [00:20:27]:
Yeah. Imagine doing what you love. Well, we are. We don't get there right away. Sometimes it takes a different path, different stories, different experiences to then kind of figure that part out. So looking forward to seeing more in store from you. And so we'll link up, I mean, I could say, "How do we find you?", but if you Google your name, there you are.
Amber [00:20:46]:
So I'll still link up the ways to find you in the different platforms in the description box. And is there anything else you want to share for the audience today? Before we wrap it up?
Victoria Pelletier [00:20:55]:
I talked about strategic intentionality, but I'm going to say that I would encourage everyone to recognize you're the CEO of "Brand You," the CEO of your career, and so you define one, what success looks like for you and your own version of "Unstoppable", to use my phrase, with this no excuses mindset, we're absolutely in control of what that looks like. And so be fearless in moving forward and achieving your goals and dreams.
Amber [00:21:20]:
I love that. I don't really know resolutions into 2024, but starting today, take yourself seriously, but also give yourself some grace. I mean, I think that's what you're saying is kind of look within and kind of trust that whatever it is that you want to bring to the table, go with it because it's so important and people need to hear that. So thanks so much for sharing your story, and we'll be looking and following you into the New Year. So I appreciate it, Victoria. Or, Tori? Do you go by Tori?
Victoria Pelletier [00:21:45]:
Really it's only my parents who called me that. It's been a long time, but I don't mind it. Tori's good.
Amber [00:21:50]:
Well, thank you, Victoria, for being here today, and we'll look forward to seeing more from you.
Victoria Pelletier [00:21:55]:
Thank you.
Amber [00:21:54]:
Thank you for joining us on today's episode of The Amber Stitt Show. For more information about the podcast, books, articles, and more, please visit me at: www.AmberStitt.com. Until next week, enjoy your journey at home, and at work. Thank you for listening!